Samhain greetings, my witchy friends! The veil is thin, and this week we celebrate the end of the witch’s year and the start of a new one. For the past week I have been feeling very depressed and fed-up. I know that part of it is grief for my lost dog. I miss him so much and it hurts deeply. He was my constant companion while I worked at home, we walked together almost every day, he took the children to school with me, he was always there. And now he is gone. There is a gaping hole in our lives, and our home feels empty and sad. I even struggled to get in the Halloween spirit, not feeling the urge to dress up or attend Halloween parties like I usually do. So, I sent the children to stay with their Nan for the weekend, and I had time alone with my husband. We have drifted apart during his busy transition into a new job, and I feel resentful because I am stuck at home running the household and caring for our family single-handedly. My grief has twisted into something resembling self-pity, and I need to shake it off.
My usual method for dealing with these mood swings is to meditate and work on improving my perspective. I have had lots of free time to meditate, and yet I simply could not bring myself to do it. My Tarot cards are sitting on a shelf waiting patiently for my return, and I don’t know what to do with them. I feel lost, confused, and I don’t know how to change this mood. I want some financial independence, but despite all my efforts, it is eluding me. I know there is a part of me that is lost, and I don’t know how to find it. For now, all I can do is wait. I must allow myself to grieve for my dog. I must continue to care for my family. I will accept that sometimes all I can do is sit still and rest. Eventually I will heal and grow strong again, and perhaps then I can address the areas of my life that feel broken, and I can work towards repairing them. Are you feeling broken, my friends? Is there a part of you that needs care and kindness? Be kind to yourselves and understand that we have no rules to follow. Listen to your body and do what feels right for you. Samhain Greetings, and Happy Halloween.
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