I am currently six months pregnant with my second child. Having experienced a fairly easy pregnancy first time around, I was not at all concerned or anxious about doing it again. Yes, I had mild morning sickness, crazy mood swings, and I developed very painful sciatica and lower back pain. But it was all part of the process, and my daughter is a healthy and happy 2 year-old. I am only now beginning to realise that every pregnancy is different. I am having many of the same symptoms as before, but I also seem to have acquired a few quirky new ones.
One very obvious difference is that my belly has grown alarmingly fast in a short space of time. With my first pregnancy, many people weren’t even aware of my condition, until I started walking round with a baby in a pram! This time around, I began to show at around 10 weeks, and now I feel rather huge and very uncomfortable. My baby is incredibly active, which actually I enjoy. We haven’t found out the sex of the child, but I am convinced it’s a boy. It seems to be constantly wriggling and fidgeting, alternately kicking and punching me throughout the day. The experience is wonderful, despite my discomfort.
During the past few weeks I have developed another strange pregnancy symptom. I seem to have lost the ability and the motivation to carry out my daily tasks. Now this might sound strange, but the only way I can describe it is that my head feels like it is full of cotton wool. I find myself wandering aimlessly around the house or the supermarket, not sure what I am supposed to be doing. It is a very unnerving situation to be in! The worst part is that my Muse seems to have emigrated. I have been working on a new novel for the past six months or so, and I cannot seem to make progress with it. I have no idea where the story is heading, what needs to happen, or even why. I just keep attempting to write a few pages here and there, and hopefully it will begin to make sense eventually.
So there we are. I am a writer who is struggling to write, and I think it is because I am pregnant. For now I am trying not to dwell on the issue. Having another baby is something very special, and I love being pregnant, despite its quirks and discomforts. People close to me have suggested I should take a break, get some rest when I can, and stop being so hard on myself. I know they are right. But it is never easy to take such sound advice, especially when I am the main carer for a lively toddler. I am hoping that if I maintain my blogs to keep the writing process active, my Muse will return in good time. For now at least, I have some editing to do, and I will take small steps to get back into the flow.
Did you enjoy this article? Sign up now to keep informed of new stories from SpookyMrsGreen.
That’s fascinating! When my wife was pregnant (our first was born two weeks ago), she was very focused and motivated to get everything done before the baby arrived. But by the end, especially in month 9, it just became too difficult to get basic chores done. I think the emotional challenges of pregnancy might be as daunting as the physical ones (though as a man, I don’t know how much my opinion counts!).
My muse went into hiding when I was pregnant with my 2nd child too. I was completing a Novel Masterclass through my local Writing Centre where we had set our own writing targets but from about 6 months onwards I felt my attention span deteriorate and my writing dried up. I eventually decided to put my novel down to work on at another time but it was the hardest thing to come back to (ended up being about 18 months later). I have made a lot of progress since then and I am back on track but I understand the struggle you are going through. If I’d been blogging back then I think continuing with it would have been the best idea. Good luck with your pregnancy and your writing! It’s certainly hard to juggle everything with young kids.
Thank you Alison, it is good to know I’m not alone with this strange affliction! Thankfully I have a few editing projects to keep me occupied so I don’t feel as though I have completely given up on my writing for the time being. Thanks for commenting!