I am a Stay at Home Mother. Does this mean I do not work? #Election2015

Today I have a serious message that I really want to discuss. I take an interest in politics, and the affairs of the UK. It is important. And recently I have been listening to all the discussion about the upcoming general election across various media channels. And, I have to say, I really don’t know who I want to vote for. My family were always split between Labour and Conservative. My husband’s family is staunchly Labour orientated. But I don’t really believe that any of the current political parties have an understanding about my life and where it is leading.

I am a writer by profession, yet I cannot call myself a worker. I don’t go out of the home to a paid job, mainly because we cannot afford the required childcare that would enable me to do such a thing. And besides, I actually want to spend time with my children while they are young, as much as they drive me crazy in the process. However, in the eyes of the higher powers in the UK, I am a nobody. I have no status. I am Just A Mother.


Ouch. That really hurts. The government, especially the Tories, keep banging on about how they are lowering unemployment in the UK. They are getting people back into work, and off state benefits. That is great. But it doesn’t help me. And it doesn’t help my close friends, those women who gave up successful and important careers so that they could stay at home and nurture their children.

Are we not providing a service here? Do we not raise children that could grow up to become very helpful, decent, and intelligent members of society? Apparently not. We have no value. We have no monetary income. We are expected to rely solely on our husbands for financial income, or else go out to work and pay for somebody else to care for our children. That doesn’t make sense to me. Does it make sense to you?

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SpookyMrsGreen: Mindful parenting and modern pagan lifestyle. See my blog for exclusive special offers, discount codes, health advice, eco-friendly tips, book reviews and more! Search #TheRedcliffeNovels and meet the vampires and werewolves of Cornwall, England.
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4 Responses to I am a Stay at Home Mother. Does this mean I do not work? #Election2015

  1. Angeline says:

    I am in the exact same boat. I have no idea who to vote for. Just waiting for someone to give me a good reason to vote for them.

  2. A friend shared a useful link: https://voteforpolicies.org.uk/ It gives you a quick survey where you choose your preferred policies from all the major parties. Mine was split between Green Party, Liberal Democrat, and UKIP! I am leaning more towards the Green Party at the moment… still undecided however.

  3. Emmacalin says:

    I think you raise a point far more important than yah boo sux party politics. The essential denigration of motherhood has been a feature of my own life too. I have often tried to assess who drives this agenda and I’m afraid to say that I think the radical feminist mammarazzi are as much to blame as anyone. Stuffy old blokes in suits who were brought up by their posh nanny until they go off to public school aren’t even in the loop. I’ve had three kids and I’ve arranged my life to be with them. I grew them in my belly because I (YES I, ME) wanted them, popped them out and have the kit to suckle them. I am a mother by decree of evolution and biology. I was an electronics engineer. I can do silicone chips better than I can do oven chips. However, my choice has been to bring up my own kids because no paid hand is gonna love them as much! Schimples. Over decades as a writer and now publisher I have built up a business that makes some money – enough for me to be officially “someone”. But I’ve never been a no one. I’ve had the school yard sneers from the mammarazzi corporate executives dragging their kid off to the next paid minder. Half the kids I know are brought up by strangers, day time TV and computer games. Of course an element of the problem has been the attitude of men to domestic servitude. On the other hand I do expect mine to rod out blocked drains, service the car and fix the washing machine. I’m gonna look back on my life with my kids and smile at all the walks I had to collect conkers and see the first snowdrops. Then there were the rides on the top of buses and picnic lunches. And all that when I should have been at a meeting about the sales figures for the new laser guided electric hairbrush. (So much “work” is just wasteful junk production) That is my personal outlook.

    However, for many other folk it is a grim necessity for both parents to work full time. Housing costs are huge (governments just shrug and mumble about market dynamics) and wages are low for most people. I’ve been very very lucky but to some extent I have forced that luck and gone without stuff. I could go on and on…..Sorry to block up your blog but I felt your point was worth a response. You are doing the right thing and I admire you for it!

    • You are quite welcome to fill my blog with your input Emma, I appreciate it! Yes, I do not regret any of my decisions when it comes to the children. I feel very resentful about the situation in our economy, mainly because of the choices I made regarding further education when I was younger, and the subsequent debt that still hangs over me. But none of that is important when I think about the time I spend with my babies, and how important it is to them that I am here when they need me. I only feel sad that their dad has to work such long hours in order to provide enough money to cover our overheads, and we have almost nothing left over for holidays. This will change in time, I am certain. We can direct the course of our lives without government aid!

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