Breakups are never easy, but they are at their most painful when kids are involved. You will inevitably feel some guilt and question virtually every decision you make. However, it’s important to remember that splitting up isn’t something you’ve taken lightly. Deep down, you know that this is the right path.
Accepting this is the first step to ensuring that the breakup and subsequent transition to the next part of your life remains smooth. Here are some follow up days that will support your cause further still.
Get Expert Advice
Many couples try to split amicably without legal battles. However, going through a divorce when children are involved is very complex. Moreover, you need to protect yourself as well as the kids, which is why speaking to a family lawyer is advised. Otherwise, you could potentially leave yourself open to even greater stress and heartache.
Completing the process through official channels provides stability for you and your children. It’s not only about the financial outcomes. More importantly, it provides confirmation about living arrangements and custody. For the sake of your children, as well as your own, leaving this to chance simple isn’t wise.
Try To Promote Stability In Other Life Areas
Going through a breakup or divorce will naturally disrupt your home life and family life. Therefore, it’s crucial that you try to maintain stability elsewhere. For example, keeping your kids in school and maintaining your work schedule will have a positive impact. If nothing else, it shows that some aspects of your life are unchanged and under control.
Similarly, you should try to keep up your gym habits and let the kids continue to see their friends. When they can see that this life change won’t turn every aspect of their world upside down, the transition is easier for them. And as you start the next chapter in your lives, several aspects will already be in place.
Create New Memories
This part of your life will inevitably involve a lot of tears and trauma. However, you can still enjoy happy moments with your kids too. Fun family activities are still available to broken families. In some cases, you may be able to do this with both parents to show a united front. Most of the time, though, it makes sense to do this separately from your ex.
If your ex continues to take the kids out too, it will highlight that they can still have lots of fun. The only difference for them is that the activities will be split across two parts of their family. Either way, using positive experiences as a counterweight for the negative moments will make this time in your life a lot less traumatic.
Allow Yourself Time To Adjust
After going through a breakup, it will take time to fully adjust. You may need to enter a new home while the family dynamic will look a little different too. Do not punish yourselves if you face teething problems. And while you want to keep a positive mindset where possible, it’s OK to mourn the relationship.
Finally, do not rush into a new relationship. And if you do find love, try to keep things moving at a suitable pace. Introducing kids to a new partner so quickly could be quite disruptive, especially if it subsequently doesn’t last. When you respect this, as well as the other features mentioned, you can come out the other side of this situation in a better place.
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*This is a collaborative article