This Witchy Wednesday post is not like the others. It’s not about crystals or spells or haunted adventures (though those remain a comforting constant in my chaotic world).

Today, I write from a place of vulnerability. The Flower Moon has stirred something deep within me. I feel raw. I feel cracked open. I feel… awake.

Speaking My Truth Beneath the Flower Moon

If you’ve followed me for a while, you’ll know that I write often about life as a mother, a wife, a witch, and more recently, the everyday reality of living in a neurodiverse household. It’s been a journey of growth, pain, healing, and the occasional meme-worthy meltdown. But today, I’m ready to speak a truth I’ve avoided for too long—maybe because saying it out loud makes it real.

I have been married for fifteen years to a man I met when we were wild, passionate, and full of dreams. In those early days, we set the world on fire with our love. He was intense, magnetic, and completely devoted—and I thrived on the spark we shared. But over the years, life dulled the flame. Or perhaps it simply shifted, as all fires do.

We built a family. We built a life. We weathered some brutal storms—emotionally, financially, spiritually. We even separated for a while during the Covid pandemic, and we chose to reunite, believing we could rebuild something new. But the truth is, we didn’t rebuild. We just returned to the same dynamic, hoping for different results.

I am Growing into Something More

Now, under the bright light of the Flower Moon, I can finally see it clearly. I am no longer the same woman who fell in love all those years ago. And I don’t think I want to be. I am growing into something more—someone more.

And here is the truth that burns in my heart: I cannot emotionally support my autistic husband anymore.

He is a good man. He is a loving father. He has his own struggles and triumphs. But energetically, he is a vampire—and I have allowed him to feed off me for more than two decades. That might sound dramatic, but if you’re an empath, if you’re a witch, if you know, then you know. I have spent years draining myself to keep him afloat. And I can’t do it anymore.

He is Stuck in a Pattern of Fear

He is stuck in a pattern of fear. Fear of change. Fear of failure. Fear of freedom, even. He fixates on problems instead of seeking solutions. He resists rest. He resists joy. Holidays are too complicated. Hobbies are unnecessary distractions. And worst of all, my creative work—my books, my blog, my spiritual practice—is seen as fluff. Frivolous. Something to be tolerated rather than celebrated.

I need more than that.

I need someone who sees my magic and says, “Yes, more, please.” I need someone who lifts me, not someone who holds me down to keep the status quo. I need fire and passion and purpose—not just duty and routine.

I don’t Know what Comes Next

I don’t know what comes next. Our children need us both. And I don’t have all the answers. But I do know this: I need to speak my truth. Even if my voice trembles.

So, to my fellow witches, empaths, and weary warriors—I see you. I feel your struggle. If you are holding on too tightly to something that no longer feeds your soul, I invite you to breathe. Cry. Sing. Dance beneath the moon. And listen to what your soul is trying to tell you.

Today’s soundtrack to my soul?

🎵 “In the End” – Linkin Park (because sometimes, no matter how hard you try…)
🎵 “Wherever You Will Go” – The Calling (for the ache of all the what-ifs)
🎵 And a selection of Bon Jovi classics, because let’s be honest, Jon has always understood my heart. Today I’ve got “These Days,” “Dry County,” and “Keep the Faith” on repeat. Because somehow, even in the midst of grief and heartbreak, I still believe in love. I still believe in me.

This is not a goodbye. This is a beginning.
The Flower Moon has cracked me open, and I am ready to bloom.

With love and moonlight,
SpookyMrsGreen 🌕✨

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